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Exhausted….It isn’t enough to describe the state I am going through right now. I am exhausted yes, this tiredness is beyond physical tiredness. It’s psychological, it’s emotional. I am tired of being strong. I am tired of trying to put on that smile on my face every day of a strong woman and be the Super Woman for anyone and everyone. I am mentally tired of everything and everyone. It’s draining me out emotionally and spiritually. I find myself in a pool of self-absorbed emotions that I can’t even share with my closest friends. I spent too long denying my own feelings and now I feel like I am the one who is unraveling. I had to learn to become strong because no one was there for me to hold me when I needed to be held the most through my hard times when I literally felt like giving up on everything. They see me as competent, but my soul is exhausted —on the inside, I am completely breaking day by day. I feel like I have spent my entire life trying to prove to myself that I am strong and being strong would be enough for me. But now I am completely exhausted from inside out. When you’re always the strong one, you’re very cautious about giving your problems to anyone else, you tend to suppress your feelings, desires, and emotions just for other’s sake. And the people who are usually so busy looking after others don’t always go around asking for help. They just assume you’re doing good when you’re not cuz they have always seen you as a strong person. Truth is that the strongest one ends up needing someone the most. I used to tell myself to not let anyone in or let them know of my struggles, But I have come to the realization that is okay not to be strong all the time. I had the belief that those that are strong, they don’t feel like they have the space to have a weak moment. Now I have found myself exhausted from running from my need to be vulnerable. I long to be taken care of, to be held tight, to be told that I mean something to them. There’s nothing wrong in craving for someone to hold you, to take care of you. Sometimes I feel too much and sometimes I feel nothing at all. Yes, I am continuing to be strong but my soul is getting exhausted. #Creatorshala #Fashion #Blogger #Creatorshalablogger #Creator #Photography #Influencer #Fashionblogger #Love #Instagram #Contentcreator #Makeup #Beauty #Style #Creatorshalainfluencer #writer

What's better than wearing a bright black and welcoming winters ??? This is one of my favourite pictures. Love it ❣️ #Creatorshala #Fashion #Blogger #Creatorshalablogger #Creator #Photography #Influencer #Fashionblogger #Love #Instagram Follow On Insta: https://www.instagram.com/tophatlifestylee/

Winter special.. Makke di roti n sarso the saag.. Unbeatable combo.. Die hard fan of this combination ?? #cshala#instagram#creatorshala#influencer#risingcreator

I know what it’s like to be emotionally exhausted. And how hard is that you try and explain it to people and you just can’t. You just can’t. How do you find words for, ‘I feel things so deeply and I give so much, sometimes it leaves me empty?’ How do you tell people what’s been bothering you? How to tell them that it’s internally sucking you out so much that you just want to end it all at once because you just can’t tolerate that trauma from the past on daily basis anymore, the memories and pain are so sharp and clear that it still felt like it was yesterday. It’s like you wake up tired because you couldn’t sleep as your thoughts and horrifying memories from the past kept you up and 3 Am welcomed you with familiar loneliness that you’ve grown used to. But still, you have to put a smile on your face so that no one will know how messed up you actually are from inside. So, the people won’t figure out what you have been through, you know what I literally don’t care about the people judging me and tormenting me for what I used to be and for what I have become, without knowing what kind of physical or mental trauma I had been through. They will just assume that you’re fine and doing well just because you’re always cracking up jokes and playing pranks, you are always there when someone needs you to share their thoughts with you but when you look around you are all alone. There are some people who just love so deeply and care so much and give every bit of themselves to others, so much so they don’t have anything for themselves. They are the people who give away parts of themselves to make others feel whole. it’s the same people who hide tears you don’t know about. You have never heard them screaming at the top of their lungs. It’s the same people who feel lonely in a crowd. It’s the same people who look at others in love and wonder when it will be their turn. I know you’re getting tired of trying so hard. I am just tired of pretending that everything is fine even though it isn’t, I am just tired of pretending that I don’t care even, I am just tired of pretending that it never happened to me and I am fine but I am not and it did happen. I am just tired. #Creatorshala #Fashion #Blogger #Creatorshalablogger #Creator #Photography #Influencer #Fashionblogger #Love #Instagram #Contentcreator

Hows this ???.. #creatorshalacreator #creatorshala #instagram #cshala #fashion #creatorshalashorts

Balcony view.. #creatorshalacreator #creatorshala #creatorshalashorts #instagram #looks #fashion

Matar mushroom In restaurant style ? #cshala#creatorshala#risingcreator#instagram#influencer

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